You Scots are sounding too English.
FIT?
Awa' an bile yer heid, min!
So ah'm playing ma bass at a gig an' 'is loon saunters up tae me and sais "fit wye de ye play a Gibson bass? Ah heard they wir gash." Weel, ah'm nae een tae back awa' fae a debate but kennin' ah'm spikkin' tae a payin' customer, ah tak's it easy on the boy. "Weel, ye heard wrang. Ye'll ken foo wrang ye are fan ye hear me play". So ah plays ma set and efter the boy comes bak' up tae me, lookin' a' sheepish. "Aht wis brilliant, min! Fit bass! Fit soun'! Ah'm awa' hame tae brak' up ma' Fenders and chuck 'em on the fire", he sais. "Weel", sais I, "ye dinna hae tae dae that min, fit wye nae try baith an' see fit ye like the best? Let's hae a beer an' nae mind that we ivver hid this conversation."
I can switch it on and off. You should hear me and my dad when I go home to the 'shire. To be fair, I rarely write in it, so it's probably horrible and phonetic, and my sincere apologies to those who know much better than me.