My Wife Cath was adopted. Her adopted Dad was a true gentleman and just a brilliant loving father to her. Unfortunately he died about 10 years ago. Her adopted Mum however has the emotional age of an 8 year old (diagnosed). She (Cath) was psychologically abused for most of her life by her mother. Her Dad kept it in check to a point when he was alive but since then its run out of control to the point that Cath no longer has any contact. It means we have to try and re-try to explain to our son why he doesn't see Grandma.
Cath has been searching for the last year for her biological parents. This is normally a stressful thing to do to start with but taking into consideration the abuse she has suffered (from my perspective) its an even more delicate operation.
Just to keep the conversation going in loops (re Uwe's comment on fertilisation center odyssey) We tried for 5 years, including 2 IVF attempts. Eventually after nearly breaking us apart we decided to try Chinese herbal medicine. Monitored once a week and taking daily the most repulsive liquid goo on earth we were successful after 6 months. Which was the minimum time the doctor told us would be possible. It was just as expensive as IVF but way less stressful and each week we took the goo made us feel better and better. Wish I could afford to keep taking it
And; My Grandmother died after 10 years of care with Alzheimers. I'm sad to say that after 6 years I stopped going to see her because it was becoming increasingly distressing for me and I'm very sure she had no idea I was there. My last visit, I took my son when he was 3 and a half.