Bassist wanted in Fort Collins area

Dave W · October 27, 2011, 06:13:38 PM

Al, need another gig? http://fortcollins.craigslist.org/muc/2667296069.html

Satanist seeking Satanic bass player (Severance)

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Date: 2011-10-24, 7:42PM MDT
Reply to: [deleted]
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I am seeking a fellow musician to join my band. Our views align strongly with Traditional Orthodox Satanism, crossed with a Luciferian ideology and traditional Witchcraft. Any familiarity you may have with the Order of Nine Angels, Michael W. Ford, Order of Phosphorus, White Star Acception, then you will know where we are coming from and what we want to do, and what we will expect from you as a human and Satanist, and musician. If you have pro gear and transportation that is necessary. Our last bass player could not understand Sacred Geometry correctly and constantly would paint our ritualistic floor Pentagram wrong. If you are good at drawing and can play the bass, please respond because it is very difficult to find fellow Satanists here in Severance, or anywhere else for that matter. No Anton Lavey poseurs allowed. We take our worship of the Dark One seriously and accept no clowns and fools or pretenders to the Throne. Be sober and play your instrument.

hieronymous · October 27, 2011, 06:23:58 PM

How come the bass player always has to draw the pentagram?!!!

gweimer · October 27, 2011, 07:59:54 PM

Traditional Orthodox Satanists? They're practically Catholic...

Rob · October 27, 2011, 08:32:23 PM

Quote from: gweimer on October 27, 2011, 07:59:54 PM
Traditional Orthodox Satanists? They're practically Catholic...

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Highlander · October 28, 2011, 01:21:50 AM

Wrong side of the pond for me, and they won't be keen on a Pagan...

ack1961 · October 28, 2011, 04:42:44 AM

They had me until "Be sober and play your instrument." Rats!

Psycho Bass Guy · October 28, 2011, 05:53:12 AM

I was all in until I found out they won't play King Diamond covers.

Pilgrim · October 28, 2011, 08:53:39 AM

"Our last bass player could not understand Sacred Geometry correctly and constantly would paint our ritualistic floor Pentagram wrong."

Well, geez, how could one put up with that?? I never wuz good at geometry, though.

Actually, I suspect the post comes from Boulder, not the Fort.

rahock · October 30, 2011, 07:32:17 AM

Quote from: ack1961 on October 28, 2011, 04:42:44 AM
They had me until "Be sober and play your instrument." Rats!

Yeah, same here. Major deal killer

.
Rick

Pilgrim · October 30, 2011, 11:04:05 AM

I wonder if they'd be interested in developing a new musical genre, "Satanic Surf"?

hollowbody · October 30, 2011, 11:29:42 AM

Quote from: Pilgrim on October 30, 2011, 11:04:05 AM
I wonder if they'd be interested in developing a new musical genre, "Satanic Surf"?

Too late... http://www.citypages.com/2009-08-12/music/lusurfer-on-a-satanic-mission-to-spread-surf-rock-to-the-masses/

Pilgrim · October 30, 2011, 11:39:28 AM

Quote from: hollowbody on October 30, 2011, 11:29:42 AM
Too late... http://www.citypages.com/2009-08-12/music/lusurfer-on-a-satanic-mission-to-spread-surf-rock-to-the-masses/

I knw I should have run a Google search before posting that.

They have this much right:

When I nod to their glasses of beer and ask if they have Pabst Blue Ribbon in Hell, they nod their heads and assure me that the underworld is actually quite pleasant. "We have everything you could possibly want," Dagon insists. "That's why we're trying to spread the word of Satan and show people that Heaven is not where you want to be. Hell is where you can let loose."

"All they have in Heaven is Natty Lite," Moloch chimes in.

The prospect of drinking only light beer makes me wonder if it could actually be heaven.

Dave W · October 30, 2011, 12:45:22 PM

Quote from: Pilgrim on October 30, 2011, 11:39:28 AM

The prospect of drinking only light beer makes me wonder if it could actually be heaven.

An eternity with lite beer and harp music doesn't sound heavenly to me.

Highlander · October 30, 2011, 02:07:45 PM

There would have to be malt-whisky in Heaven, after all, the true name means water of (after) life...

Lite beer could only be served in Hell... making something look like beer, and then take away all the fun...?

I like the idea that Hell would be selective... One persons Hell is, etc... the explorer in a locked room... the bassplayer with no strings...

What would be your own personal Hell...? Mine would be a slap-bassist in a disco-glam band for all eternity...

dadagoboi · October 30, 2011, 02:19:43 PM

Quote from: BUFF on October 30, 2011, 02:07:45 PM
...What would be your own personal Hell...? Mine would be a slap-bassist in a disco-glam band for all eternity...

Hey, it's a steady gig!