First offender

[exiledarchangel]

A woman is on trial for beating her husband to death with his guitar collection.
Judge: First offender?
Woman: No, first a Gibson, then a Fender

[Droombolus]

Smart woman ! No only will the Gibsons break while he's still concious ( ouch ! torture ! ) but the Fenders will finish him off must faster .......

[Highlander]

For jokes that bad I'd send you back to Greece; maybe to work in border control...! 

[Droombolus]

I have you know that I haven't been in Greece for some 40 odd years. 

[Highlander]

Not you, you crazee Nederlander, the bananaman at the top of the tree...!

[exiledarchangel]

And I thought Uwe would be the first to bite the bait...

[Pilgrim]

Shall we take a vote on changing your username to Bananaman? 

[Dave W]

I have you know that I haven't been in Greece for some 40 odd years. 

What's a Grecian urn? 

[Pilgrim]

What's a Grecian urn? 

Less than last year, I bet!  (Very bad joke...) 

[Highlander]

And I thought Uwe would be the first to bite the bait...

... and you know if he had been around he probably wood have with his love of bass-ic humour, and it wood take a German to crack "and you know you've Kost-us a packet..." anyway, he's probably litigating loitering round here somewhere...

[uwe]

Alas!, can't I even go to a funeral of a 93-year old auntie? No age to complain about. Her dear husband already left us 60 years ago (motorbike accident), hopefully, the spouses will still recognize each other now.

You do know you're aging when the Catholic priest is young enough to be your son and looks decidedly Indian!

Greek urn? The amount varies, but the thing to know is that gross = net. It's all tax-free.

[Highlander]

My sympathies for your loss...

When talking young Catholic priests, I'm reminded of the character in a certain exceptionally poignant Clint Eastwood film of recent vintage concerning a certain green automobile and life choices...

[Dave W]

Less than last year, I bet!  (Very bad joke...) 

Rowan & Martin time.

Also, time for a henway.