Why animal rights activists don't pick on bikers.

[Denis]

I don't know if this is fact or not but it sure is funny!

Pennsylvania - ~Three Reported Missing After Animal Rights Activists Take "War on Leather" to Motorcycle Gang Rally.~

Johnstown, PA: Local and state police scoured the hills outside rural Johnstown, Pennsylvania, after reports of three animal rights activists going missing after attempting to protest the wearing of leather at a large motorcycle gang rally this weekend. Two others, previously reported missing, were discovered by fast food workers "duct taped inside several fast food restaurant dumpsters," according to police officials.

"Something just went wrong," said a still visibly shaken organizer of the protest. "Something just went horribly, horribly, wrong."

The organizer said a group of concerned animal rights activist groups, "growing tired of throwing fake blood and shouting profanities at older women wearing leather or fur coats," decided to protest the annual motorcycle club event "in a hope to show them our outrage at their wanton use of leather in their clothing and motor bike seats." "In fact," said the organizer. "Motorcycle gangs are one of the biggest abusers of wearing leather, and we decided it was high time that we let them know that we disagree with them using it... Ergo, they should stop."

According to witnesses, protesters arrived at the event in a vintage 1960's era Volkswagen van and began to pelt the gang members with balloons filled with red colored water, simulating blood, and shouting "you're murderers" to passersby. This, evidently, is when the brouhaha began.

"They peed on me!!!" charged one activist. "They grabbed me, said I looked like I was French, started calling me 'La Trene', and duct taped me to a tree so they could pee on me all day!"

"I... I was trying to show my outrage at a man with a heavy leather jacket. And, he... he didn't even care. I called him a murderer, and all he said was, 'You can't prove that.' Next thing I know is he forced me to ride on the back of his motorcycle all day, and not left me off, because his girl friend was out of town and I was almost a woman."

Still others claimed they were forced to eat hamburgers and hot dogs under duress. Those who resisted were allegedly held down while several bikers "farted on their heads."

Police officials declined comments on any leads or arrests due to the ongoing nature of the investigation, however, organizers for the motorcycle club rally expressed "surprise" at the allegations. "That's preposterous," said one high ranking member of the biker organizing committee. "We were having a party, and these people showed up and were very rude to us. They threw things at us, called us names, and tried to ruin the entire event. So, what did we do? We invited them to the party! What could be more friendly than that? You know, just because we are all members of motorcycle clubs does not mean we do not care about inclusiveness. Personally, I think it shows a lack of character for them to be saying such nasty things about us after we bent over backwards to make them feel welcome."

When confronted with the allegations of force feeding the activists meat, using them as ad hoc latrines, leaving them incapacitated in fast food restaurant dumpsters, and 'farting on their heads,' the organizer declined to comment in detail. "That's just our secret handshake," assured the organizer.

[Pilgrim]

I'm confident it's not true, but the very thought is amusing.

The survivors would have quite a story to tell.

[gweimer]

Nice story!  It should have included a part where one of the animal acivists said "What are they gonna do to us?  We have a right to express our beliefs."

[Denis]

As an avid motorcyclist who attends antique motorcycle swap meets where there are large numbers of bikers, the thought of animal rights activists showing up to one of those never occurred to me.

[gweimer]

Probably a spoof.    I found a link to the story - "Blurring the lines, smearing the names"

http://glossynews.com/tag/animal-activists/

Still makes a nice yarn, though.

[Dave W]

Probably a spoof.    I found a link to the story - "Blurring the lines, smearing the names"

http://glossynews.com/tag/animal-activists/

Still makes a nice yarn, though.

A site whose top story is Warning!: Bank Zombies Out to Get You!? 

Yes, I think there's a faint possibility it's a spoof. 

[Denis]

I figured it was a spoof and normally I check when the article seems serious. In this case, I just larfed me arse off!

[SKATE RAT]

i think thats really funny, as look at my 3 leather jackets in the closet.

[Barklessdog]

Could this be linked to the Slut Spill?

[Highlander]

I'm surprised they didn't end up as burgers... 

[Rhythm N. Bliss]

If you think this is funny, you'll enjoy all the descriptions of punishments inflicted to people in HELL.

[Freuds_Cat]

As an atheist and having had very negative first hand experiences with Animal rights activists in the UK I find that most dubious yarn very funny.  Thanks Denis