The Last Bass Outpost

Main Forums => The Outpost Cafe => Topic started by: OldManC on April 14, 2010, 05:37:44 PM

Title: She Choked Me With Her Nubs
Post by: OldManC on April 14, 2010, 05:37:44 PM
Quote
A St. Paul man charged with beating up a quadruple amputee last week admitted Monday that he hit the woman, but only after she hit him first...

Although Bell had both hands and part of both legs amputated because of a childhood illness, Smith said she can still be violent when she loses her temper.

"She'll swing, push me down and choke me with her nubs," Smith said. He said she also hit him with her wheelchair.

Read more here:

http://www.twincities.com/ci_14780030?source=most_viewed

 :mrgreen:
Title: Re: She Choked Me With Her Nubs
Post by: Denis on April 14, 2010, 05:50:50 PM
I'm armless speechless.
Title: Re: She Choked Me With Her Nubs
Post by: Freuds_Cat on April 14, 2010, 08:44:40 PM
Why does Monty Python come to mind here?    The knights that say "Ni"  "Come back here and I'll bite your bloody kneecaps!" (or somesuch)
Title: Re: She Choked Me With Her Nubs
Post by: Dave W on April 14, 2010, 10:22:59 PM
'Tis but a scratch.

A scratch?! Your arm's off!

No, it isn't.
Title: Re: She Choked Me With Her Nubs
Post by: Highlander on April 15, 2010, 03:15:17 AM
Yes it is...!
Title: Re: She Choked Me With Her Nubs
Post by: Denis on April 15, 2010, 03:36:34 AM
And not for something completely different...

...a larch.


(http://i94.photobucket.com/albums/l111/bigtreebluesea/Larch.jpg)

Title: Re: She Choked Me With Her Nubs
Post by: Highlander on April 15, 2010, 03:38:44 AM
I never realised until recently that "And now for..." was a mickey-take on a UK kids program called Blue-Peter...
Title: Re: She Choked Me With Her Nubs
Post by: uwe on April 15, 2010, 09:29:52 AM
We have way too few threads about amputee sex here.


(http://25.media.tumblr.com/QA9JpdgnOd696gbcmAaudo2m_r1_500.png)
Title: Re: She Choked Me With Her Nubs
Post by: Highlander on April 15, 2010, 12:56:43 PM
'armless fun, really...
Title: Re: She Choked Me With Her Nubs
Post by: TBird1958 on April 15, 2010, 01:03:10 PM
Okay, I'll admit it...........Sex with an amputee of either sex would be   ;D











I'm so weird....... :sad:
Title: Re: She Choked Me With Her Nubs
Post by: Highlander on April 15, 2010, 01:06:13 PM
I'm glad you said that... I was beginning to wonder...  ;D
Title: Re: She Choked Me With Her Nubs
Post by: Psycho Bass Guy on April 15, 2010, 01:30:25 PM
Being a Danzig fan, I collected Verotik comics for awhile. There's a whole issue about a lesbian who becomes so obsessed with amputee sex that she drugs her lover and chops off her forearm and lower leg, telling her it was a lawnmower accident. You guys should be more well-read.  ;D
Title: Re: She Choked Me With Her Nubs
Post by: Denis on April 15, 2010, 03:41:54 PM
My girlfriend has a fetish for amputees, so I usually keep the hatchet locked up in the shed when she visits.
Title: Re: She Choked Me With Her Nubs
Post by: uwe on April 15, 2010, 03:53:23 PM
No subject is sacred here.
Title: Re: She Choked Me With Her Nubs
Post by: OldManC on April 15, 2010, 09:33:33 PM
Someone must ask Sir Paul about this...
Title: Re: She Choked Me With Her Nubs
Post by: Freuds_Cat on April 15, 2010, 10:22:39 PM
Someone must ask Sir Paul about this...

Damnit!  I hate it when I read comment and think to myself "I wish I'd thought of that"  :mrgreen:
Title: Re: She Choked Me With Her Nubs
Post by: Aussie Mark on April 15, 2010, 10:39:44 PM
When I read the title I thought it was a typo, and was going to be about nugs, not nubs.
Title: Re: She Choked Me With Her Nubs
Post by: Dave W on April 15, 2010, 10:52:34 PM
Someone must ask Sir Paul about this...

He's probably stumped.

He was her crutch for so long.

Title: Re: She Choked Me With Her Nubs
Post by: uwe on April 16, 2010, 01:08:30 AM
Dave!
Title: Re: She Choked Me With Her Nubs
Post by: Denis on April 16, 2010, 04:29:07 AM
This thread is just limping along.
Title: Re: She Choked Me With Her Nubs
Post by: uwe on April 16, 2010, 04:38:30 AM
Some crippling logic here.
Title: Re: She Choked Me With Her Nubs
Post by: Dave W on April 16, 2010, 09:50:23 AM
I certainly don't want to be insensitive to amputees or anyone who has difficulty getting around. Just repeating a couple of jokes that were going around when Paul and Heather split.
Title: Re: She Choked Me With Her Nubs
Post by: Highlander on April 16, 2010, 02:00:55 PM
She took him for an arm and a leg...

Okay, maybe just the leg...
Title: Re: She Choked Me With Her Nubs
Post by: Dave W on April 23, 2010, 05:07:33 PM
I immediately thought of this thread when I saw a link (at Harper's Magazine) to this product: girlfriend body pillow (http://www.sears.com/shc/s/p_10153_12605_SPM223900328P?vName=Bed+%26amp%3B+Bath&sName=Pillows&cName=Bedding+Essentials&aff=Y&keyword=deluxecomfort.com+girlfriend+body+pillow&sid=I0084400010000100312)

Sears, where America used to shop.

Edited to add: maybe we should chip in and buy one for the defendant.