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Main Forums => The Outpost Cafe => Topic started by: godofthunder on December 30, 2009, 04:15:58 PM

Title: anal fixation topic
Post by: godofthunder on December 30, 2009, 04:15:58 PM
Quote from: uwe on September 10, 2009, 11:07:30 AM
I'm glad that this forum's previous obsession with anal sex has now found a worthy topic successor!
Speaking of which I have the dreaded colonoscopy next week, so much for my virginity. :o
Title: anal fixation topic
Post by: Lightyear on December 30, 2009, 06:58:47 PM
I understand that the procedure is not nearly as bad as the prep :puke:

Maybe they'll take a souvenier photo for you ;D

It's good you're getting it done - nothing to kid around with - I have three more years...
Title: anal fixation topic
Post by: Nocturnal on December 30, 2009, 08:44:58 PM
The prep is terrible! You're not awake for the invasion part, at least I wasn't. I have about a year to go before my second one. :-[
Title: anal fixation topic
Post by: birdie on December 30, 2009, 09:23:17 PM
The drugs were grrreat!
Title: anal fixation topic
Post by: gweimer on December 31, 2009, 04:03:06 AM
Yeah, the prep is the worst part of the whole procedure.  I got pics of my first one.  I proved, without a doubt, that my wife has been wrong about me all these years.   :mrgreen:
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: Barklessdog on December 31, 2009, 05:40:58 AM
Quote from: birdie on December 30, 2009, 09:23:17 PM
The drugs were grrreat!

+1000

My insurance company made me get one. Best drugs ever. I never felt so good before (drugs) & after it (cleansing).
Flushing the radiator really makes one plumbing feel brand new again!
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: rahock on December 31, 2009, 06:48:48 AM
 I've been through two. The procedure is absolutely nothing. Out cold, couldn't even tell you for sure that it happened. The prep.........ooooh golly, I pooped so much I think I lost ten points off my IQ :o
Rick
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: Pilgrim on December 31, 2009, 09:07:48 AM
The prep isn't bad except for the lost day and getting too darn raw.

Drugs?  I was asleep, I have no idea.  But I'm not really fond of anything that makes me feel like I'm not 100% on top of things.
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: OldManC on December 31, 2009, 09:40:53 AM
I think I have a few years before I get the privilege but I feel for you just the same, Scott. Here's hoping everything checks out as it should!
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: Dave W on December 31, 2009, 09:52:55 AM
In case anyone overlooked it, this book  (http://www.abebooks.co.uk/search/tn/romance+proctology/sortby/3)was listed on the page I linked to in the Strange Books thread.

Looks like there's only one. Scott, better buy it quick so you'll have something to read during the procedure.
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: Pilgrim on December 31, 2009, 10:29:32 AM
The sequel would be "Bass Player Scott, Frontier Proctologist"...?
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: patman on December 31, 2009, 10:42:45 AM
The only hassle is the prep.  Good luck.
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: TBird1958 on December 31, 2009, 11:11:49 AM

I especially liked the time the Policeman said: "we're not warming the probe up for you anymore!"


;)
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: Hornisse on December 31, 2009, 12:15:51 PM
I always check to see if my doctor has skinny fingers!  :mrgreen:
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: Darrol on December 31, 2009, 02:38:36 PM
It is nice to know that I have a lot more time between now and when I have to go through it compared to all of you. I still have 11 days before I can legally drink as it is.
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: TBird1958 on December 31, 2009, 03:16:36 PM


Yikes Darrell! My liver has been of *age* longer than you've been alive  :-[
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: Lightyear on December 31, 2009, 05:22:19 PM
Yeah mine too! :sad:

I've got a coworker that said he was serving Geritol jello shots at his new years eve party :P
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: Darrol on January 01, 2010, 12:08:49 AM
Well I did make mention of my age in the topic giving thanks. I was the youngest active member at TDP for years after joining when I was 15 in 2004.
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: uwe on January 01, 2010, 05:03:18 AM
Amazing, we've then been a consistently bad influence on you.
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: rahock on January 01, 2010, 07:24:14 AM
Quote from: uwe on January 01, 2010, 05:03:18 AM
Amazing, we've then been a consistently bad influence on you.

Mission Accomplished ;D
Rick
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: Highlander on January 01, 2010, 09:20:08 AM
Quote from: gweimer on December 31, 2009, 04:03:06 AM
I got pics of my first one.  I proved, without a doubt, that my wife has been wrong about me all these years.   :mrgreen:

Still cleaning up the laptop after a "spurt" of  :mrgreen: tea...

Quote from: Big D Bassist on December 31, 2009, 02:38:36 PM
I still have 11 days before I can legally drink as it is.

18 in the UK... gonna go PARTY...? ( :puke: :toast: :puke: :toast: :puke: )
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: Pilgrim on January 01, 2010, 09:46:31 AM
Quote from: TBird1958 on December 31, 2009, 03:16:36 PM

Yikes Darrell! My liver has been of *age* longer than you've been alive  :-[

You and me both, Mark!  I turn the big 6-0 this year.  Gonna have to play hard and get moer exercise under the "use it or lose it" theory of life.
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: gearHed289 on January 01, 2010, 02:21:33 PM
I haven't actually read any of this thread, but the subject line reminded me of last night for some reason.  :mrgreen: ;) :o 8)
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: TBird1958 on January 01, 2010, 03:24:25 PM

Something you're not telling us Tom?






It ok really..............we're very understanding here  ;)
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: Hornisse on January 01, 2010, 05:49:48 PM
Perhaps it involved some of this?   ;D

(http://i45.tinypic.com/2yorfaa.jpg)
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: gweimer on January 01, 2010, 06:09:54 PM
Hmmm...a three-pack certainly suggests some real commitment.

To quote The Groove Tube - you can always trust something from Uranus.
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: Pilgrim on January 01, 2010, 06:45:43 PM
I do NOT want to know what the phrase "High Potency" means on the label of those tubes. :-\
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: Lightyear on January 01, 2010, 09:00:59 PM
Well, at least it didn't say anything about being flavorless :P  :rimshot:
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: lowend1 on January 02, 2010, 05:28:53 PM
Quote from: gweimer on January 01, 2010, 06:09:54 PM
Hmmm...a three-pack certainly suggests some real commitment.

Or an unusually er, expansive target area. :o
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: TBird1958 on January 02, 2010, 06:06:26 PM


Awww.........it's Desensitizing gel  ???


Who would want that?!?
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: Grog on January 02, 2010, 07:53:45 PM
I was recertified a few years back, (Perfect A__ Hole)! The prep, as many have mentioned, is the only bad part. I only wish that somebody would have mentioned to aply vasoline or something to your backside before it was raw from blowing out a couple gallons of go-litely from it. By the time you figure that out, it's too late. A good friend of my wife found out a few months ago that she had stage 4 colon cancer. She is only 42 years old, 8 years younger than most of us get our first checkup. It had spread to her lungs & she had a nasty cough, that's how they ended up finding out about it. As un-pleasant as this procedure is, it is better than the alternative.  :o :o :o
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: Freuds_Cat on January 03, 2010, 06:05:45 AM
Quote from: TBird1958 on January 02, 2010, 06:06:26 PM

Awww.........it's Desensitizing gel  ???


Who would want that?!?

Awww Mark, now I've gotta clean up MY tea spill!   LOL  ;D
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: gearHed289 on January 03, 2010, 05:07:23 PM
Oh man... I finally got around to reading all that. Seriously, I am LOL!
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: uwe on January 04, 2010, 06:36:08 AM
More often than not, our seemingly worst fears are our only thinly veiled fiercest desires ...

Sigmund F.
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: Dave W on January 04, 2010, 09:37:50 AM
Is that why Sigmund F. was called the father of psycho-anal-ysis?
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: Pilgrim on January 04, 2010, 10:48:49 AM
Highly anal-ytic question!
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: Freuds_Cat on January 04, 2010, 02:42:56 PM
....here we go again  :rolleyes:   ;D

right thread for it I guess
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: OldManC on January 04, 2010, 03:55:18 PM
In the final analysis, we always come back to the ass...
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: uwe on January 04, 2010, 07:54:02 PM
That is where the main thrust of our musings seems to go ...
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: TBird1958 on January 04, 2010, 09:19:58 PM


You guys are all talk.......................... ;D








Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: birdie on January 04, 2010, 10:25:40 PM
and in the END, the love you take, is equal to....etc etc
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: uwe on January 05, 2010, 04:58:13 AM
Ok, that let's us transcend smoothly into a learned discussion why John Lennon was gay ...

He wasn't always that way, Yoko made him!
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: lowend1 on January 05, 2010, 05:30:15 AM
Quote from: uwe on January 05, 2010, 04:58:13 AM
Ok, that let's us transcend smoothly into a learned discussion why John Lennon was gay ...

He wasn't always that way, Yoko made him!

I guess sometimes a guy can just get sucked into that lifestyle...
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: Highlander on January 05, 2010, 08:00:23 AM
Yoko...? Oh No...!
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: Pilgrim on January 05, 2010, 08:33:23 AM
Quote from: uwe on January 05, 2010, 04:58:13 AM
Ok, that let's us transcend smoothly into a learned discussion why John Lennon was gay ...

He wasn't always that way, Yoko made him!

Geez, I love it when people follow established tradition!  In the 60's and 70's, Yoko was blamed for everything from the Beatles' breakup to occurrences of the common cold.

Uwe, you're a very traditional guy.
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: Dave W on January 05, 2010, 09:17:57 AM
Yoko once said that sawing things in half is an art in itself. I think she applied that to the Beatles.

But I forgive her because of her fine vocal performances.

WARNING: you'll be sorry if you click on this. Don't blame me.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b9fFnVudKSI
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: OldManC on January 05, 2010, 10:43:34 AM
That's funny, yesterday I was going to mention John and Brian's holiday to Barcelona but got busy doing other things! That was before Yoko came into the picture, don't you know...
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: OldManC on January 05, 2010, 10:47:08 AM
And Dave, I know better than to click on that! Where's that puke emoticon when you need it. Oh, it's here:  :puke:
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: godofthunder on January 05, 2010, 11:02:24 AM
I had a pretty good idea what it was going to be. As bad as I remember.....................maybe worse.
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: godofthunder on January 05, 2010, 11:09:19 AM
btw tomorrow is the big day  :P
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: Pilgrim on January 05, 2010, 11:11:32 AM
Quote from: Dave W on January 05, 2010, 09:17:57 AM
Yoko once said that sawing things in half is an art in itself. I think she applied that to the Beatles.

But I forgive her because of her fine vocal performances.

WARNING: you'll be sorry if you click on this. Don't blame me.




Having lived through that era, I was able to restrain myself from committing clickery.
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: Barklessdog on January 05, 2010, 01:09:42 PM
Quote from: godofthunder on January 05, 2010, 11:09:19 AM
btw tomorrow is the big day  :P

Good luck, hope they get to the bottom of it.
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: lowend1 on January 05, 2010, 06:16:20 PM
Quote from: godofthunder on January 05, 2010, 11:09:19 AM
btw tomorrow is the big day  :P

Scott, FWIW, you have my sympathy and moral support. I turned 50 yesterday, so I'm sure my doc will pencil me in for an invasion at some point in the not too distant future. For some reason, I keep having visions of the Alaska (Alasska?) Pipeline...
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: TBird1958 on January 05, 2010, 06:28:39 PM


Virgins..............  :-*
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: Freuds_Cat on January 05, 2010, 07:22:20 PM
Good luck Scott
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: Denis on January 06, 2010, 05:36:14 AM
Quote from: godofthunder on January 05, 2010, 11:09:19 AM
btw tomorrow is the big day  :P

Hope it turns out well and that nothing turns out!

Quote from: lowend1 on January 05, 2010, 06:16:20 PM
Scott, FWIW, you have my sympathy and moral support. I turned 50 yesterday, so I'm sure my doc will pencil me in for an invasion at some point in the not too distant future. For some reason, I keep having visions of the Alaska (Alasska?) Pipeline...

Happy belated Birthday!
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: godofthunder on January 06, 2010, 08:18:21 AM
 Guys Thanks for the support. No doubt about it the prep sucks not much sleep last night and many trips to the bathroom.  I am not sore from all those trips I used medicated wipes and applied A&D after each trip, a pain to be sure but worth the effort as I feel no ill effects from the volume of liquid and number of trips. I arrived for my procedure at 7:00 AM and was back in the van by 8:32. The procedure took maybe 20 min. I was able to get in and out so fast because I was not sedated. Very minor discomfort as the colon was inflated with Co2 but other than that a breeze. While all the other people in recovery were out of it and waiting to be released to a family member I was having a cup of coffee and asking for my cloths. I am so glad I was not sedated, I hate the feeling and it comes back days later to bite you. Today I am supposed to take it easy and no heavy lifting for 3-5 days. I just finished a nice steak and eggs breakfast at my favorite dinner :) Oh yeah one little polup. that was it, hopefully nothing. I feel good and am ready to go.
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: Lightyear on January 06, 2010, 08:23:59 AM
Glad it went well and hopefully that polup is not one of the bad ones.

I didn't know that you could do it without some type of sedation - I also loathe the aftermath of being under - makes me fell like kaka for several days aftewards.
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: gearHed289 on January 06, 2010, 09:20:21 AM
Quote from: godofthunder on January 06, 2010, 08:18:21 AMbut other than that a breeze.

Huh huh.....  8)
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: Dave W on January 06, 2010, 09:21:58 AM
I'm glad it all came out okay.
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: godofthunder on January 06, 2010, 09:30:06 AM
Quote from: gearHed289 on January 06, 2010, 09:20:21 AM
Huh huh.....  8)
Tom Glad to see you got my attempt at subtle(or not so subtle) wit.
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: TBird1958 on January 06, 2010, 09:31:18 AM


So............. Now that you're not a virgin?!?


;)
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: godofthunder on January 06, 2010, 09:32:55 AM
Sorry Mark they didn't turn me, Hetero as ever :)
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: TBird1958 on January 06, 2010, 01:48:18 PM


Just glad it doesn't sound like anything serious bro!   :)
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: godofthunder on January 06, 2010, 01:51:00 PM
 Same here brutha !
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: Barklessdog on January 06, 2010, 01:58:46 PM
My wife goes week from this Friday.

Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: godofthunder on January 06, 2010, 02:03:19 PM
Keeping my fingers crossed for your missus !
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: Highlander on January 07, 2010, 07:29:34 AM
Proctologist to a dentist at a medical convention... "I don't know how you can put your fingers in other peoples mouths..." (variation on the gynaecologist joke)

Have we finally plumbed the depths of this thread...?

Got to the bottom of it all...?

Or have we finally "got this thing on the move...", until some constipated mathmatician works out their problems with a pencil...

One interesting POV - this all sounds like the US health system has this setup as a regular thing past a certain age point - this is not the case in the UK - regular gynae checks, but nothing of this kind of treatment... "Big C" tends to be based on heriditary checks, then you move up the ladder...
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: Dave W on January 07, 2010, 08:34:13 AM
Quote from: Kenny Five-O on January 07, 2010, 07:29:34 AM

One interesting POV - this all sounds like the US health system has this setup as a regular thing past a certain age point - this is not the case in the UK - regular gynae checks, but nothing of this kind of treatment... "Big C" tends to be based on heriditary checks, then you move up the ladder...

Not really set up as a regular thing, it's just stressed by doctors as something you ought to do.
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: gweimer on January 07, 2010, 09:33:03 AM
Rodney Carrington did a routine about going fishing with his proctologist, and trying to find something to talk about all day.
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: Highlander on January 07, 2010, 09:45:00 AM
That reminded me of an awful joke that I won't repeat verbatim...

Q. Why are women "built" the way they are...?

A. So you can carry them like a "six-pack..."
Title: Re: anal fixation topic
Post by: Grog on January 07, 2010, 07:52:44 PM
The same doctors that perform Colonoscopy's also do Endoscopy's (spelling?). Pretty much the same thing, just down the other end. A co-worker was scheduled for a Colonoscopy at 6:00 & my wife was scheduled for an Endoscopy about two hours later with the same doctor. My smart ass comments about wondering if the doctor cleaned it off in between procedures was not appreciated much.... :puke: