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Author Topic: First offender  (Read 2401 times)

exiledarchangel

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First offender
« on: August 16, 2015, 12:06:46 AM »
A woman is on trial for beating her husband to death with his guitar collection.
Judge: First offender?
Woman: No, first a Gibson, then a Fender
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Droombolus

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Re: First offender
« Reply #1 on: August 16, 2015, 01:52:25 AM »
Smart woman ! No only will the Gibsons break while he's still concious ( ouch ! torture ! ) but the Fenders will finish him off must faster .......
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Highlander

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Re: First offender
« Reply #2 on: August 16, 2015, 01:56:08 AM »
For jokes that bad I'd send you back to Greece; maybe to work in border control...!  :o :mrgreen:
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Droombolus

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Re: First offender
« Reply #3 on: August 16, 2015, 01:58:30 AM »
I have you know that I haven't been in Greece for some 40 odd years.  ;D
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Highlander

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Re: First offender
« Reply #4 on: August 16, 2015, 02:07:30 AM »
Not you, you crazee Nederlander, the bananaman at the top of the tree...! :mrgreen:
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The random mind of a Silver Surfer...
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Staring at that event horizon is a dirty job, but someone has to do it; something's going to come back out of it one day...

exiledarchangel

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Re: First offender
« Reply #5 on: August 16, 2015, 01:43:06 PM »
And I thought Uwe would be the first to bite the bait...
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Pilgrim

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Re: First offender
« Reply #6 on: August 16, 2015, 03:03:53 PM »
Shall we take a vote on changing your username to Bananaman?  ;D
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Dave W

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Re: First offender
« Reply #7 on: August 16, 2015, 03:48:48 PM »
Quote from: Droombolus on August 16, 2015, 01:58:30 AM
I have you know that I haven't been in Greece for some 40 odd years.  ;D

What's a Grecian urn?  :mrgreen:
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Pilgrim

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Re: First offender
« Reply #8 on: August 16, 2015, 07:33:03 PM »
Quote from: Dave W on August 16, 2015, 03:48:48 PM
What's a Grecian urn?  :mrgreen:

Less than last year, I bet!  (Very bad joke...)  :-X
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Highlander

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Re: First offender
« Reply #9 on: August 16, 2015, 11:32:21 PM »
Quote from: exiledarchangel on August 16, 2015, 01:43:06 PM
And I thought Uwe would be the first to bite the bait...

... and you know if he had been around he probably wood have with his love of bass-ic humour, and it wood take a German to crack "and you know you've Kost-us a packet..." anyway, he's probably litigating loitering round here somewhere... :mrgreen:
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uwe

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Re: First offender
« Reply #10 on: August 17, 2015, 09:13:03 AM »
Alas!, can't I even go to a funeral of a 93-year old auntie? No age to complain about. Her dear husband already left us 60 years ago (motorbike accident), hopefully, the spouses will still recognize each other now.

You do know you're aging when the Catholic priest is young enough to be your son and looks decidedly Indian!

Greek urn? The amount varies, but the thing to know is that gross = net. It's all tax-free.
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Highlander

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Re: First offender
« Reply #11 on: August 17, 2015, 10:34:04 AM »
My sympathies for your loss...

When talking young Catholic priests, I'm reminded of the character in a certain exceptionally poignant Clint Eastwood film of recent vintage concerning a certain green automobile and life choices...
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The random mind of a Silver Surfer...
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Staring at that event horizon is a dirty job, but someone has to do it; something's going to come back out of it one day...

Dave W

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Re: First offender
« Reply #12 on: August 17, 2015, 07:52:13 PM »
Quote from: Pilgrim on August 16, 2015, 07:33:03 PM
Less than last year, I bet!  (Very bad joke...)  :-X

Rowan & Martin time.

Also, time for a henway.
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