The Last Bass Outpost

Main Forums => The Outpost Cafe => Topic started by: Dave W on January 06, 2016, 01:18:19 PM

Title: German technology wins again
Post by: Dave W on January 06, 2016, 01:18:19 PM

German carpenter invents on-off contraception switch for sperm (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/europe/germany/12083673/German-carpenter-invents-on-off-contraception-switch-for-sperm.html)

Now if he can just combine this technology with The Clapper (http://www.asseenontv.com/the-clapper/detail.php?p=295535).....

Title: Re: German technology wins again
Post by: Granny Gremlin on January 06, 2016, 02:54:15 PM

Finally, a vasectomy with an apocalypse failsafe.  I'm not even kidding; my interest is piqued.

Title: Re: German technology wins again
Post by: uwe on January 07, 2016, 09:44:24 AM

Okaaaaay ..., we don't have our reputation for cutting edge technology for nothing you know! Never mind how kill switches on wooden instruments are an acquired taste.

That said, I

- rejoice to hear that Dave, as a man his age, still takes an active, undiminished interest in questions of fertility (and how to prevent it),

- am convinced that the carpenter, when with his lady, must tie her hands (so-called bondage component to eliminate unwelcome scrotum rubbing), otherwise it's: "Baby, better not touch me there again or you might regret it in nine months from now ...".

As member of a forum dedicated to the universal scientific truth that physics cannot be fooled I further feel honor-bound to warn other members to not try any of this at home ...

(https://handyhomeowner.files.wordpress.com/2011/07/washer-hose-bulge.jpeg)

OTOH: Maybe the phrase "It just clicked between the two of us in bed!" might take on a totally new - more apprehensive - meaning in the future?

Title: Re: German technology wins again
Post by: TBird1958 on January 07, 2016, 10:57:45 AM

 No additional plumbing for my Poodle please  :-*

 Anal sex, it just makes sense  :gay:

Title: Re: German technology wins again
Post by: uwe on January 07, 2016, 12:12:49 PM

Dr. Mark's easy household prescriptions for everyone:

fun's in the buns = no source of remorse!!!

No other forum puts as much light on the topic. Inspectors of truth, penetrators of subjects we are.

Title: Re: German technology wins again
Post by: Pilgrim on January 07, 2016, 02:19:13 PM

As Uwe would put it, another example of his penetrating wit.

Title: Re: German technology wins again
Post by: TBird1958 on January 07, 2016, 02:39:42 PM

Quote from: uwe on January 07, 2016, 12:12:49 PM

Dr. Mark's easy household prescriptions for everyone:

fun's in the buns = no source of remorse!!!

No other forum puts as much light on the topic. Inspectors of truth, penetrators of subjects we are.

 You and your way with words  ;D

Title: Re: German technology wins again
Post by: Dave W on January 07, 2016, 05:42:21 PM

Just be sure to wear one of these (http://www.amazon.com/BigMouth-Inc-The-Willy-Warmer/dp/B00E868ZWW).

Title: Re: German technology wins again
Post by: Highlander on January 08, 2016, 01:13:45 AM

Oh...! No warning, Dave...! :D

Title: Re: German technology wins again
Post by: uwe on January 08, 2016, 06:53:36 AM

The art of producing a suitable condom has somehow gone lost in America. That is a really wooly construction there ...

Title: Re: German technology wins again
Post by: TBird1958 on January 08, 2016, 08:28:35 AM

Quote from: uwe on January 08, 2016, 06:53:36 AM

The art of producing a suitable condom has somehow gone lost in America. That is a really wooly construction there ...

 You didn't mention that you'd purchased some during your visit - I'd imagine wool to be either good or bad under certain conditions............Outside during Winter months it could help with "shrinkage"  8)

Title: Re: German technology wins again
Post by: uwe on January 08, 2016, 09:18:47 AM

I guess next to the pleasures of a real sheep that wooly contraption might find some stiff support after all.

Title: Re: German technology wins again
Post by: Pilgrim on January 08, 2016, 09:26:01 AM

Wooly? Would that be the L.L. Bean black & red plaid version?

Title: Re: German technology wins again
Post by: uwe on January 08, 2016, 11:43:31 AM

The discreet silence of the lambs.

Title: Re: German technology wins again
Post by: Granny Gremlin on January 08, 2016, 11:54:11 AM

Quote from: uwe on January 08, 2016, 06:53:36 AM

The art of producing a suitable condom has somehow gone lost in America. That is a really wooly construction there ...

It's the Genghis Kahn Sig Model.

Title: Re: German technology wins again
Post by: Dave W on January 08, 2016, 12:53:27 PM

Quote from: Highlander on January 08, 2016, 01:13:45 AM

Oh...! No warning, Dave...! :D

An enterprising highlander could have some produced in tartan patterns for his kilted countrymen. Think about it.

Title: Re: German technology wins again
Post by: Highlander on January 08, 2016, 02:14:22 PM

How can you tell a Highlanders Clan...? :mrgreen: :mrgreen:

Maybe tweed would be a bit too manly...? :o