36 cheap American beers ranked

[Dave W]

http://deadspin.com/36-cheap-american-beers-ranked-638820035

I don't care about the beers, but I did enjoy his comments. Example: 33. Rolling Rock. Smells like three fat guys in a two-man tent. 

[gweimer]

My son started with Keystone, because "you could drink a lot for cheap".  Six years later, he's got his Cisterone certificate and is working at The Great Divide brewery.  I think he's trying to leave Denver and head back to Chicago in the hopes of working for Three Floyds.

I did love the comments.  I used to like MGD for a cheap, easy drinking beer.  They should have included Rhinelander, which is the only beer I ever had that tasted like the can.

[eb2]

You can do a lot worse than Grain Belt, and I do have a few Gansetts around the shack.  Mostly fun reading.

[gearHed289]

I had too many Coor's Lights yesterday. Hey, it's what was in the cooler behind the stage! Not feeling so great today. 

[Highlander]

... which is the only beer I ever had that tasted like the can.

ROFL... 

[TBird1958]

Growing up in Washington we had the original Olympia (Oly, or Olies) and Rainer (Raindog) and yes, as a high scholl ruffian, trouble making, musician I drank quite a few! Grain Belt gets honorable mention, my Grandfather drank it, often while smoking a pipe   

[westen44]

Some of the jokes are funny.  But cheap American beer really is that bad.  I haven't tried everything on that list, but I've had quite a number.  Pabst is the only one on there that I had that I'd be able to tolerate.   The Germans, Dutch, and Belgians seem to know how to make cheap beer but we don't.  It's that simple.  I don't know what their secret is, but obviously neither does anyone else.

[Pilgrim]

Nice commentary, and quote perceptive.  I resonated to the comment about "...at a license-plates-on-the-wall kind of restaurant."  Most of the places I ate while living in Texas fit that description.  The ones that sell BBQ are pretty damn good.

I've always found PBR to be a decent, drinkable beer, and Coors is more than decent, it's just undistinguished.  Never been a fan of Bud's taste.

I have never, nor will I ever, consider any beer with the words "Lite" or "Light" in the name, to be real beer.  The best you can say about it is that someone's horse passed its test and they had to find something to do with the leftover sample.

But now that I'm living in beer snob heaven, I tend toward amber ales, porters and stouts, non of which are ever likely to show up in the "cheap" category.

The best thing I can say about most cheap beers is to paraphrase Victor McLaglen in "Fort Apache" when he said to the Colonel (Henry Fonda): "Well, 'tis better than no whiskey at all, sir."

The full and delightful exchange:

[in the storeroom at Meacham's trading post, the soldiers find boxes marked "Bibles" - Col. Thursday tells the men to open them - when they do, they find kegs of whiskey instead]

Sgt. Quincannon: Bibles, sir!
Lt. Col. Owen Thursday: [Col. Thursday hands a cup to Sgt. Mulcahy] Sergeant, pour me some scripture.
[Sgt. Mulcahy dips the cup into a keg and hands it to Col. Thursday. He takes a sip and spits it out]
Lt. Col. Owen Thursday: What's in this? Brimstone and sulfur?
Silas Meacham: You know what it is and I'm entitled to keep it.
Lt. Col. Owen Thursday: Your license may permit you to keep a medicinal store of whiskey, but this is no whiskey.
Silas Meacham: Perhaps you're not used to frontier whiskey.
Lt. Col. Owen Thursday: I don't know... I've tasted most everything.
[to Sgt. Mulcahy]
Lt. Col. Owen Thursday: Sergeant, you a judge of whiskey?
First Sgt. Festus Mulcahy: [looks around at the others] Uh, well, sir, some people say I am and some say I'm not, sir.
Lt. Col. Owen Thursday: [hands him the cup] Tell me what you make of this.
First Sgt. Festus Mulcahy: [takes a drink - makes a face at Meacham - takes another drink] Well, uh, it's better than no whiskey at all, sir.

[GonzoBass]

Growing up in Washington we had the original Olympia (Oly, or Olies) and Rainer (Raindog) and yes, as a high scholl ruffian, trouble making, musician I drank quite a few!

Back in my young and dumb drinking days, when money was tight, I'd occasionally grab a 40 of Rainier.
That stuff use to seriously give me nightmares.

[Pilgrim]

Rainier was famed for having TV commercials created from employee ideas.







And I always loved the Hamm's ber sport siwth the bear and forest animals...

[gweimer]

My son, the aspiring brewmaster, has everyone beat for beer snobbery.  He and some of his friends are big on gypsy runs of limited beer.  Because you still can't get truly fresh European beer here, what they do now is make "tours" for brewmeisters.  Some guys from Germany/Holland/wherever will come over and do a tour of small breweries.  They will make a limited run of their special brew, and then head out for the next city.  My son has traveled as far as a few hundred miles just to get a sample of the freshest European beer this side of the Atlantic.

[Highlander]

Al's comments re the Colonel reminded me of an anecdote from my Burma research about my dad's commanding officer...

When they were behind the lines all supplies were sent in by "drops" from Dakotas and "specials" were usually identified with a coloured ribbon... this might be orders, or photo recon material, or "luxuries" ...

Well, his C/O Bill Henning used to get a "rum-drop" and these bottles were kept in his horse's saddlebags, and his groom/batman, an ex jockey (champion one, by all [turf] accounts) ensured they remained secure... once they had reached a "safe-harbour" for the night the call could be heard "Paddy...! Fetch my saddlebags...!" and everyone knew what it meant...

[Hörnisse]

When I drank at gigs I'd always get Ziegen Bock. 

[Lightyear]

Not a beer snob, and don't drink that much to begin with, but cheap beer is easy for even me to taste.  I once spent four weeks in Biinghamton, NY for training and, being on per diem, we made out money last as long as we could - if I never, ever heard of Gennesee anything I would be fine   Tasted like fermented ditch water strained through moldy sweat socks........

As for PBR - it can't be that bad if Jerry Jeff sang about it

[Dave W]

They should have included Rhinelander, which is the only beer I ever had that tasted like the can.

I checked to see if Rhinelander was still in business. They are, and now they're also offering craft beers. The mind boggles.

Anyway, here's my favorite old beer commercial from the former Jacob Schmidt Brewery in St. Paul.